Mental Anguish: A reality or a myth?

It was 2005……………….. And I was in charge that evening admitting and caring for an elderly man on hospice care. It was a usual evening, busy, people, talks, care…………………..

But what do we know of mental anguish? And why do I ask that now? Or I did at that time? Little did know that what it is, is what it was and what it will be…………. did you guess?

I was supposed to be doing my usual thing…………… right …………….. but what instead the dying man would be telling us instead? Sending chills down your spine?

The family surrounded the man…………….. and as he took his last meal……………….. Was washed and dressed up. He looked kind, gentle but an aura of mental anguish surrounded him. What did he know? What did he seek? Why was he this way? How was this experience of dying in him?

Many unanswered questions………………. for me and for him???? Was I right or wrong? Was I understanding or curious? Was I helping or solving?

No one would know for sure…………………….

It was past 5 pm now. Surrounded by more of his family members…………. he was taking in a sip here and there and longed for something…………. which I could not understand!

Maybe he wanted to tell a secret, would it come out, would it not/ or would he pass away not telling them?

The clock ticked away…………. into the evening sunset in the horizon…………… and to our surprise he said, “I am crossing the bridge now! It is beautiful and I see the light, in the distance! Suddenly I saw a halo surround his head and glorify his spirit and he breathed his last, his last breath and was gone!

To the utter dismay of his family, this was the moment they dreaded! They had more to exchange and more to it and he…………… just walked with Gods angels!

I was surprised, perplexed and stupefied! I wanted an answer, was he ok doing this? Was he happy doing this? Was he at peace finally doing this?

So gathering my courage as I stroked his head and spent some silent moments with his family counseling…………… I knew his mental anguish was gone forever!

So in celebrating death and dying he was at peace with the painting of the dying journey in the process!

So here I call upon others, Look to your left, look to your right, look at the earth and look at the sky………………………….. many times we find meaning of existence in there……………….. and to the intelligence and brilliance of this story……………………….. our mission is still unaccomplished but is possible!

Thank you, blessings, for peace, love, happiness and inspiration…………………… from the realities and myths of the lives we lead!

Best regards, from the desk of Purnima Sreenivasan, #healthaiminc #geriatric #death&dying #hospice